Yes, the holidays are around the corner! Your life is going reasonably well. You’re focused, “on track” and feeling centered…yet all of a sudden your workload triples, an employee leaves, or a significant person in your life becomes emotionally distraught, or perhaps a death or illness surprises the family. And, children offer unpredictable challenges too.
And then it’s the holidays! One of my strengths as a coach, is guiding my clients in living and working from greater states of peace, centeredness and balance. This is the essential ingredient for magnetizing success and fulfillment, whether you are developing a relationship, own a business, manage a team, raise children, trade in the stock market, or are losing weight. Your outside world doesn’t have to equal your inside world. Life is always presenting new challenges to strengthen our spirit, expand our consciousness, and foster growth. Learning how to master accessing the “calm” in any storm is a worthy goal, but it IS obtainable. What is your current “storm”? I challenge you to find your center in the eye of it all.
6 Keys to Mastering “Being Calm” in the Eye of the Storm.
1. Be grounded and connected to yourself. When external chaos arises in our environment, there is a natural human tendency to focus outward on “solving the problem”. When too much of our energy gets tied up “over there”, we can lose our center and our power. This is the most essential ingredient in “successfully dancing” with ANY challenge or difficult situation. Get reconnected to your power immediately. When we aren’t grounded, we lose access to our intuition, best thinking and resources to handle the situation.
Being grounded means being connected to your body, and your power. Breathe. Stand up. Feel your legs under you, connected solidly to the ground. Imagine a steel rod extending down through the back of your spine into the core of the earth, while simultaneously extending up through the crown of your head into the sky. Breathe. You may also recall a time in your life when you were exceptionally grounded. Performing well in sports or business. The more you become conscious of accessing your power and sense of grounded-ness, the more you will naturally live from this space.
2. Surrender to “what is”. The “storm” is happening. Okay, so it is. Quit wishing that “reality” were different than it is. It’s raining, snowing or hailing. You CAN’T control it. You can’t control the stressed emotions or behaviors of another human being. You can’t control events. You can’t control the decisions of customers. You can’t control blocks that come up along the way. You can’t control time. There are certain steps to establishing or igniting a business. However, as we see things for what they are, you realize you CAN control your internal emotional experience. As you are grounded to yourself, you can ALWAYS handle “what is”.
3. Live from the present moment. You can witness a “storm” as a beautiful act of nature, or focus on the damage that may ensue (FUTURE) or the damage already done (PAST). Focusing on the past or the future takes you out of the present moment, and immediately places you in fear, worry or stress. Dwelling on a worst case scenario that may never come is wasted energy. BE HERE NOW. When we’re truly PRESENT to the moment, it becomes clear what the next step is. In the present moment you have the greatest access to wisdom and guidance. While anticipating the future is useful, we don’t want to live there…especially during a storm. CALM comes from having ALL of your energy with you in present time. Just as you lose your power and center when your energy is wrapped up in someone else’s problem outside yourself, you lose energy when you dwell too much in the future or past. Be here now.
4. Consciously choose the higher path. Managing your energy is the theme of this article, as it is the essential ingredient to remain calm and centered…whether a “storm” is present or not. David Hawkins book, Power vs. Force offers a scale to depict higher energy vs. lower energy emotions (see Soulfully Living Issue #9). When we are caught up in lower level emotions such as fear, anxiety, guilt, anger, grief or hopelessness, our energy is heavy and dense. From this perspective, it’s easy to see only the “worst case scenarios”, as you witness the “storm”. Access to wisdom is limited.
However, you can consciously choose to raise your energy. You may start by accessing “courage” and a “willingness” to change. You may focus on what you “appreciate” about the situation and your life. You may start “trusting” the process. Perhaps you accept “what is”…the circumstances, your own anxiety or the emotional upset of another. Laughing, drinking water, movement, and being present are all quick ways to raise your energy. Looking for the gifts in the “storm” is also an effective strategy. Just because you got caught momentarily in a negative emotion, doesn’t mean you have to live there. Make a commitment to keep your energy level HIGH. Make conscious choices. From a high energy state…decisions are easy, patience is infinite, love flows, and magic happens.
5. Recognize and anticipate the GIFTS and “perfection” of your current “storm. Often times the greatest crises are the catalyst for remarkable growth. There are gifts for us to embrace at every step along the way. Is your business slower than you’d like? Perhaps the gift is extra time with the children or an opportunity to refine your vision. Is your spouse going through a difficult period? Perhaps this is the juncture for a life-altering change that will ultimately create more joy for you both. Does it feel that you won’t ever complete your enormous task list and your new business will never flourish? Perhaps this is an opportunity to create new systems, and create a new mindset in taking your business to the next level. Perhaps this “storm” is an opportunity for you to really “get” that you CAN remain calm and centered in the eye of any “storm”.
There is always a gift. Often there are MANY.
6. The Dance Between Responsibility and Trust. TRUST that what is to come ALWAYS serves the Greater Good. AND, as life is unfolding…take responsible action. We do the best we can in comforting a spouse, solving a problem, managing our day and defining a strategy. Part of taking responsibility is also investigating your own reactions, fears or eliminating a limiting belief. Yet, there comes a point when we need to trust the process. All is unfolding as it should. Again, leaning too much on the side of responsibility, we’re trying to “control the storm”, and that doesn’t work. If it’s raining out, you may pull out an umbrella, collect the water for another purpose, or just enjoy the experience of it – recognize that all “storms” do come to an end.
The question is, are you going to be exhausted and depleted when the “storm” is over…or will you have a smile on your face, knowing you’ve somehow optimized the storm? The choice is always yours.
Enjoy the season and remember these 6 Keys.